possessiveness

Once again, my  two different worlds are merging..

and i not so sure i like it. not that i actively dislike it..but somehow, past experiences have always made me wary of making my different worlds meet. it has always created in me an awkward phase when the worlds that meet become more important to each other, than they are to me individually...that i was the cement of those two worlds, was often forgotten, much to my secret chagrin.

as i write this, i remember i had once met this lady in the local train(where else), who suddenly out of the blue asked me "where do u get ur salwar stiched?..can i get the number of the tailor?" . this of course was in those days, where Malls, mix and match, ready mades had still not become the order of the day. i was flattered, and as luck would have it, i was actually going to that particular tailor. I offered to take her to the tailor, and then we never looked back.

on the other side, there was this other lady, whom i got acquainted and loved instantly...we had met at a morcha for water problems that had plagued our society in those days .there was no way i wouldn't have fallen for her open guileless charms. in those days, i used to be a strict daughter, of a strict father.smiling only when it was unavoidable. never spoke more than needed. especially to strangers. she with her winsome smile, and openness, gave me the much needed air to breathe..the freedom of being me. not trapped in a role, given by my father or mother or both, to me, to be played. with her,i exulted. Around her, i re- became the child that i was before discipline killed it.

one day, i felt, that my two worlds should meet. but within an hour i was upset. i felt Lady A was sidelining me to warm up to Lady B. maybe she found her charms irresistible too. Or maybe she wanted to be one up on me. Lady B on her part, didn't notice the power struggle going on. She was her usual pleasant self. But i was burning...with unspeakable ire.

it took me a few days, before i got adjusted to the new equations.

today, when i look back im able to laugh. cause after all that power struggle, my both worlds remain more or less the same..they are as friendly with me as they are before.and im still the more important person, in both relationships.

okay, worlds, meet, you have my blessings. il manage to assuage my hurts. love u, worlds.