give and take

Haven't we all come across people whom we think are bad givers?
whom we feel shortchanged when we interact with them over prolonged periods of time.
 especially if they are family members, or people to whom we are married to?

Sometimes we arent even fully aware that the continuous sense of unfulfilment in certain relationships arise from this particular reason. we dont feel 'given' to.(i've already covered giving in another post...giving.. essence of giving is connecting).

I ve come across people who somehow cant feel loved, unless they are in a take take relationship.
.if they have to give, they feel shortchanged.
 for the person on the other end ie stuck in a give give situation, its a bit difficult to sustain such relationships, unless the person who is the taker is way too rich or way too beautiful or way too talented etc.
 which i guess means, that the taker thinks he is way above the ordinary.
 he feels that the very fact that he has chosen the person to take from is something the giver has to appreciate as his 'giving'...

It usually works, only if the giver is the kind of person who is afraid of taking, ie afraid to debit his credit balance so as to speak. then and only then, is the situation a win win situation.


in all other cases, the relationship is doomed for failure. give and take is an essential part of any relationship, for it to sustain. the balance depends of course on the individual personalities.